Fools Reunited

Whilst you're sitting on your settee, minding your own business,someone will approach you pretending to be your "loving wife" complete with gratuitous sex and your favourite snack. She will then subtly ask if you have a balance on your credit card. This is where you MUST answer "Yes, it's completely maxed out", otherwise she will cleverly slip it from your wallet while pretending to enjoy fondling your coconuts. Later that day, while you rest comfortably on the couch remote in hand, your card will be used to purchase half a dozen ridiculously overpriced "sale" items. The scam is so diabolical it resists any recourse by the presentation of one small gift, purchased with your card of course, special for you only. Your "loving wife" will then revert back to "moody hag" and disappear to wherever it is they go while you're in the house.

THIS IS DAFTER'S JOKE OF THE DAY - HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT!!

Thanks to Nulty for the idea!

Daftnest is like garlic - a little bit goes a long way!

Sorry Nulty - just couldn't resist!

As you know I recently met my wonderful boyfriend Igor on a blind date. I can recommend blind dates to anyone but beware of the pitfalls.

To help you through the minefield of dating I've put together a short gazetteer or is that gizitteer!

DATING: The process of spending enormous amounts of money, time, and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don't especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future.

EASY: A term used to describe a woman who has the morals of a man.

EYE CONTACT: A method utilized by a single woman to communicate to a man
that she is interested in him. Despite being advised to do so, many women have difficulty looking a man directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to shyness, but usually due to the fact that a woman's eyes are not located in her chest.

FRIEND: A member of the opposite sex in your acquaintance who has some
flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.

INDIFFERENCE: A woman's feeling towards a man, usually interpreted by the
man as "playing hard to get."

IRRITATING HABIT: What the endearing little qualities that initially
attract two people to each other turn into after a few months together.

NYMPHOMANIAC: A man's term for a woman who wants to do it more often
than he does.

SOBER: A condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love.

ATTRACTION: The act of associating horniness with a particular person.

LOVE AT 1st SIGHT: What occurs when two extremely horny, but not
entirely choosy people meet.

LAW OF RELATIVITY: How attractive a given person appears to be is
directly proportionate to how unattractive your date is.

HAVE FUN - I HOPE YOUR LOVE LIFE IS AS DAFT AS MINE!