http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/This is the blog of Thomasina Fool (an alter ego).Fools Reunited has been created to provide a meeting place for my Foolish Friends.So please be silly and enjoy some foolishness. "Take all the fools out of this world and there wouldn't be any fun living in it" (Josh Billings)en-EUMokoFeed10http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/http://data5.blog.de/design/preview/61/340cc6d5ab2926720915e9e9387a91_160x200.jpghttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/11/confession-time-3835028/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-03-11:/2008/03/11/confession-time-3835028/Tue, 11 Mar 2008 09:30:17 +0100 <p><big>I started this blog on 19th June 2007 in order show the fun-loving side of me. I've loved every minute of Dafter's "Fools Reunited" blog but have decided that it's now time to confess who I really am. </p> <p>Some of you are already friends on my other blogs and at least two of you have already seen through my disguise (mainly because of my carelessness). Thank you for not blowing my cover!</p> <p>I won't be deleting this blog because it contains so many fun memories for me but I won't be posting any new items.</p> <p>So if you aren't already on my other friends lists and want to be please send me an invite to which ever one you'd like to be on. </p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/dafter/1706174" title="dafter"><img src="http://data4.blog.de/media/174/1706174_8c2852bd03_s.gif" alt="dafter" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a>Now it's time to reveal the real Dafter.</p> <p>So it's goodbye from Dafter, hello from <a href="http://mypoetry.blog.co.uk/"><strong>ME</strong></a> and hello from <a href="http://myplace2.blog.co.uk/"><strong>HER</strong></a> </p> <p>Oh! this is not a joke <img src="/img/smilies/grayno.gif" alt=":no:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p><img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> HAVE A LOVELY DAY <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/11/confession-time-3835028/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>friendsfunfoolshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/11/confession-time-3835028/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/10/for-blog-s-sake-3847766/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-03-10:/2008/03/10/for-blog-s-sake-3847766/Mon, 10 Mar 2008 10:05:05 +0100 <p><big>If you are thinking about leaving and/or torching your blog please, please tell your "friends". As someone rightly pointed out.</big></p> <blockquote><p>I've had various blogs in several places and have always informed people of my intentions, which seems to be the courteous thing to do, especially for friends</p></blockquote> <p><big>And here's Meno's views - I know she won't mind!</big></p> <blockquote><p>There's Blog Land and then there's Real Life and oh, never the two shall meet.</p> <p>But, sometimes they DO meet.</p> <p>There have been a few of us that have met one another and developed non-cyber relationships. We have become mates.</p> <p>I can most assuredly say that having met some bloggity mates, I would never, I mean I could NEVER disappear from here leaving my mates high and dry as I have meet some lovely people; I know how they move and I've seen how they live.</p> <p>They are genuinely real, human beings. Full of life, thoughts and feelings.</p> <p>But, I also recognize when someone must leave the building so to speak and move on as they see fit.</p></blockquote> <p><big>Take a few minute to look at this suggestion and read the comments made by other bloggers.</p> <p><a href="http://ideas.blog.co.uk/2008/03/09/bloggers-leaving-3843789">http://ideas.blog.co.uk/2008/03/09/bloggers-leaving-3843789</a></p> <p>Remember even virtual friends have feelings - try and show some compassion.</p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/image013/2026234" title="!image013"><img src="http://data1.blog.de/media/234/2026234_5083a656ce_s.gif" alt="!image013" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/10/for-blog-s-sake-3847766/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>bcukbloggers-leavingfriendshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/10/for-blog-s-sake-3847766/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/04/where-s-lyndlj-3814730/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-03-04:/2008/03/04/where-s-lyndlj-3814730/Tue, 04 Mar 2008 11:20:45 +0100 <p><a href="http://www.xcomment.com/search/happy birthday/Popular/1/"><img src="http://www.xcomment.com/g1/img/2082807014231.gif" border="0"></a> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/04/where-s-lyndlj-3814730/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>bcukfriendsbirthdayhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/04/where-s-lyndlj-3814730/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/03/thought-for-the-day-3809465/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-03-03:/2008/03/03/thought-for-the-day-3809465/Mon, 03 Mar 2008 10:21:05 +0100 <p><a href="http://www.xcomment.com/search/you may be the world/Popular/1/"><img src="http://www.xcomment.com/g2/img/world030208022308.gif" border="0"></a> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/03/thought-for-the-day-3809465/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>friendfunthoughthttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/03/thought-for-the-day-3809465/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/03/cooee-kelly-3809419/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-03-03:/2008/03/03/cooee-kelly-3809419/Mon, 03 Mar 2008 10:10:17 +0100 <p><a href="http://www.xcomment.com/search/surprise bear/Popular/1/"><img src="http://www.xcomment.com/g2/img/6bvbxb7030208062933.gif" border="0"></a></p> <p><a href="http://www.xcomment.com/search/happy birthday/Popular/1/"><img src="http://www.xcomment.com/g1/img/Happy_Birthday_2082807031215.gif" border="0"></a></p> <p>Have a lovely day! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/03/cooee-kelly-3809419/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>birthdaymenohttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/03/03/cooee-kelly-3809419/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/22/title~3764069/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-22:/2008/02/22/title~3764069/Fri, 22 Feb 2008 11:12:20 +0100 <p><big>Dafter's Friday Five - see I'm bi-lingual too!</p> <p>1. What was the last thing you cooked?</p> <p>The Books! <img src="/img/smilies/grayyes.gif" alt=":yes:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>2. What was the last thing you tried on?</p> <p>Chatting up a policeman! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>3. What was the last thing you purchased on credit?</p> <p>Wot's credit? <img src="/img/smilies/grayconfused.gif" alt=":??:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>4. What was the last thing you put a postage stamp on?</p> <p>My nose! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_crazy.gif" alt=":crazy:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>5. What was the last thing you took a photo of? </p> <p>My nose! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p><strong>DON'T FORGET TO HAVE A FRISKY FRIDAY AND A WHOOPEE WEEKEND!</p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/fools4/2027194" title="FOOLS4"><img src="http://data1.blog.de/media/194/2027194_f70767a113_s.jpg" alt="FOOLS4" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p></strong></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/22/title~3764069/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>friday-fivefriendsfunhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/22/title~3764069/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/22/rowtheboat~3763807/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-22:/2008/02/22/rowtheboat~3763807/Fri, 22 Feb 2008 10:09:44 +0100 <p><big>OK Happy Birthday to you! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_lalala.gif" alt=":lalala:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>Now for the serious stuff <img src="/img/smilies/grayyes.gif" alt=":yes:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p><strong>Why is rowtheboat called rowtheboat?</strong></p> <p>Answers/suggestions please <img src="/img/smilies/grayyes.gif" alt=":yes:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>"Row, row, row the boat gently down the blog.<br> Verily, Verily, Verily, Verily, life is but a slog" </p> <p><img src="http://bestsmileys.com/birthday1/25.gif"></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/22/rowtheboat~3763807/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>friendsbirthdayhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/22/rowtheboat~3763807/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/18/drunk_and_disorderly~3745488/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-18:/2008/02/18/drunk_and_disorderly~3745488/Mon, 18 Feb 2008 16:57:47 +0100 <p><big>This is a barrel of fun and a rather irreverant piece of writing that made me smile! </p> <p>I apologise to anyone it may offend. It's just a bit of Monday fun! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p><strong>The Landlords Prayer</strong></p> <p>Our lager<br> Which art in barrels<br> Hallowed be thy drink<br> Thy will be drunk<br> (As I am drunk)<br> At home as in the tavern<br> Give us today our foamy head<br> And forgive us our spillage<br> As we forgive those who spill against us<br> And lead us not into incarceration<br> But deliver us from hangovers<br> For thine in the beer the bitter and the lager<br> Forever and ever<br> Barmen</p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/th_friends/2026374" title="th_Friends"><img src="http://data1.blog.de/media/374/2026374_04ddad1db3_s.jpg" alt="th_Friends" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a><br> </big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/18/drunk_and_disorderly~3745488/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>lagerhumourdrinkingfriendsfoolshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/18/drunk_and_disorderly~3745488/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/13/billy_no_mates~3723317/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-13:/2008/02/13/billy_no_mates~3723317/Wed, 13 Feb 2008 20:09:47 +0100 <p><big>Thanks BCUK for this message: </big></p> <blockquote><p>You are not a member of a group </p></blockquote> <p><img src="http://bestsmileys.com/big/4.gif"> </p> <p><big> Right that's it!</p> <p>Who wants me to be in their <del>gang</del> group?<img src="http://bestsmileys.com/big/1.gif"></p> <p>Let's party!<img src="http://bestsmileys.com/party/5.gif"> </p> <p></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/13/billy_no_mates~3723317/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>groupfriendsbcukhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/13/billy_no_mates~3723317/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/12/rising_sap~3715496/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-12:/2008/02/12/rising_sap~3715496/Tue, 12 Feb 2008 10:10:54 +0100 <p><big>What's going on this morning? <img src="/img/smilies/icon_rolleyes.gif" alt=":roll:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p><a href="http://usksider.blog.co.uk/2008/02/12/morning_glory~3715272">Usky</a> starts off with:</big></p> <blockquote><p><strong>"Just a quickie for the start of the day......."</strong></p></blockquote> <p><big>Then <a href="http://eagle-eye.blog.co.uk/2008/02/12/bad_start~3715368">Kevin</a> continues with:</big></p> <blockquote><p><strong>"I woke up feeling a little dicky ........"</strong></p></blockquote> <p><big>I daren't imagine what <a href="http://jackfrost.blog.co.uk/">Jack Frost </a>will come up with! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif" alt="8|" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>Crumpet anyone? <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/12/rising_sap~3715496/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>foolsfunspringfriendshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/12/rising_sap~3715496/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/09/do_not_open~3688094/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-09:/2008/02/09/do_not_open~3688094/Sat, 09 Feb 2008 08:10:00 +0100 <p><big><strong>You were warned!</strong></big></p> <p><a href="http://www.xoospace.com/" title="Myspace Comments - Monster"><img src="http://xs3.xoospace.com/myspace/graphics/12508.gif" alt="Myspace Comments - Monster" border="0"></a></p> <p><big><strong>Go on admit it! You did didn't you?</strong></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/09/do_not_open~3688094/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>funfriendsfoolsfrighthttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/09/do_not_open~3688094/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/05/i_m_giving_up~3682446/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-05:/2008/02/05/i_m_giving_up~3682446/Tue, 05 Feb 2008 13:28:01 +0100 <p><big>..... being sensible!</p> <p><a href="http://www.xoospace.com/" title="Myspace Comments - Act stupid"><img src="http://xs3.xoospace.com/myspace/graphics/13913.jpg" alt="Myspace Comments - Act stupid" border="0"></a></p> <p><a href="http://www.xoospace.com/" title="Myspace Comments - Stupidity"><img src="http://xs3.xoospace.com/myspace/graphics/28049.gif" alt="Myspace Comments - Stupidity" border="0"></a></p> <p><img src="/img/smilies/icon_crazy.gif" alt=":crazy:" class="middle" border="0"> So ...... go on then ...... what exactly are <strong><u>you</u></strong> giving up? <img src="/img/smilies/icon_crazy.gif" alt=":crazy:" class="middle" border="0"></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/05/i_m_giving_up~3682446/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>lentfriendsfunhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/05/i_m_giving_up~3682446/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/05/tossers~3682231/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-05:/2008/02/05/tossers~3682231/Tue, 05 Feb 2008 12:40:24 +0100 <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/tosser/2323632" title="Tosser"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/632/2323632_871fa9d617_s.jpg" alt="Tosser" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p><strong>The Pancake Tossing World Record</strong></p> <p>The Rules:</p> <p>(If you want to break a record that is published in a record book or governed by an international authorithy, there may be other or additional rules). </p> <p>The record is for the number of times a pancake (the same on each time) can be tossed in two minutes. It should be made with 170 g (6 oz) of batter, in a pan with a base measurement of 15.2 cm (6 in). The ingredients used should be edible and comprise flour, eggs and milk. </p> <p>The frying pan should weight at least 340 g (12 oz) and have a base measurement of at least 21.5 cm (8 1/2 in.) </p> <p>The number of tosses should be counted and recorded in a satisfactory manner, and this figure confirmed in the signed statements. </p> <blockquote><p>World Records from 1988 to 1997</p> <p>232 Philip Artingstall (Great Britain) 16-02-1988<br> 262 Philip Artingstall (Great Britain) 28-04-1988<br> 281 Judith Aldridge (Great Britain) 27-02-1990<br> 283 Philip Artingstall (South Africa) 22-05-1992<br> 307 Philip Artingstall (South Africa) 23-02-1993<br> 349 Dean Gould (Great Britain) 14-01-1995<br> 399 Dean Gould (Great Britain) 1997<br> 416 Ralf Laue (Germany) 28-06-1997</p></blockquote> <p><strong>** Tosses head and flaunts off! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_crazy.gif" alt=":crazy:" class="middle" border="0"><br> </strong> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/05/tossers~3682231/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>funpancakeshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/05/tossers~3682231/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/04/it_s_monday~3677337/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-04:/2008/02/04/it_s_monday~3677337/Mon, 04 Feb 2008 12:06:01 +0100 <p><big>Ask me if I'm bothered!</big></p> <p><a href="http://www.xoospace.com/" title="Myspace Comments - Happy Monday"><img src="http://xs3.xoospace.com/myspace/graphics/23309.jpg" alt="Myspace Comments - Happy Monday" border="0"></a></p> <p>What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? </p> <p>I don't know and I don't care!</p> <p><big> HAVE A GOOD ONE! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/04/it_s_monday~3677337/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>friendsfunmondayhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/04/it_s_monday~3677337/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/02/time_for_your_injection~3667996/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-02:/2008/02/02/time_for_your_injection~3667996/Sat, 02 Feb 2008 21:35:00 +0100 <p><big>Now this isn't going to hurt <img src="http://bestsmileys.com/medical/6.gif"> - apart from a little tickle to your ribs perhaps.</p> <p>In case you think I've completely lost it, this is Dafter's daily dose of medicine to help my blogfriend Ed <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/wensum24/">(Wensum24)</a> keep smiling. </big> <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p><strong>English As A Fifth Language</strong></p> <p>A European pulls up at a bus stop where two Englishmen are waiting.</p> <p>"Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?" he asks.<br> The two Englishmen just stare at him. </p> <p>"Excusez-moi, parlez vous Francais?" he tries.<br> The two continue to stare. </p> <p>"Parlare Italiano?"<br> No response. </p> <p>"Hablan ustedes Espanol?"<br> Still nothing. </p> <p>The guy drives off frustrated. The first chap turns to the second<br> and says, "Y'know, maybe we should learn a foreign language." </p> <p>"What for?" asks the other. "That guy knew four languages, and it<br> didn't do him any good."</p> <p><img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> <big>Bye for now - I'll be back to give you a bed bath later! <img src="http://bestsmileys.com/medical/4.gif"></p> <p></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/02/time_for_your_injection~3667996/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>get-well-soonfriendfunhumourhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/02/time_for_your_injection~3667996/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/01/a_bloscar_for_dafter~3663932/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-02-01:/2008/02/01/a_bloscar_for_dafter~3663932/Fri, 01 Feb 2008 12:27:02 +0100 <p><a href="http://www.xoospace.com/" title="Myspace Comments - Its Friday"><img src="http://xs3.xoospace.com/myspace/graphics/19741.gif" alt="Myspace Comments - Its Friday" border="0"></a></p> <p><big>No! <img src="/img/smilies/grayno.gif" alt=":no:" class="middle" border="0"> Well they didn't have a "Daftest Blogger" category so I guess I'm in a class of my own! <img src="/img/smilies/grayyes.gif" alt=":yes:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>Good luck to all the Bloscar Nominees <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/01/a_bloscar_for_dafter~3663932/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>bloscarshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/02/01/a_bloscar_for_dafter~3663932/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/30/ready_eddie_go~3654749/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-30:/2008/01/30/ready_eddie_go~3654749/Wed, 30 Jan 2008 15:15:46 +0100 <p>This is especially for my friend Ed (Wensum24) your daily dose of daftness as prescribe by me! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>I hope that this night nurse is more to your liking?</p> <p><a href="http://www.xoospace.com/" title="Myspace Comments - Sexy Nurse Hello"><img src="http://xs3.xoospace.com/myspace/graphics/17122.gif" alt="Myspace Comments - Sexy Nurse Hello" border="0"></a></p> <p>A little 8 year old boy wanted to be circumcised when he realized he looked different than dad and his friends. The day after the proceedure he returned to school. During class, he became uncomfortable and asked for permission to go to the nurse. When he arrived at her office, he hesitated and finally just asked if he could call his mother. Sensing this was personal, the nurse stepped into the hall and closed the door to allow him privacy. Several minutes later the little boy came out of her office and the nurse noticed his penis was sticking out of his pants. "Where are you going?" she asked. "Back to class," said the boy. "But you can't go back like that!" explained the nurse. "I have to," stressed the boy. "My mother said that if I could just stick it out until lunchtime, she would come and pick me up."</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/30/ready_eddie_go~3654749/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>night-nursefriendhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/30/ready_eddie_go~3654749/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/29/what_would_your_answer_be~3647717/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-29:/2008/01/29/what_would_your_answer_be~3647717/Tue, 29 Jan 2008 06:42:15 +0100 <p><big>When you're woken up at midnight by a phone call and someone asks "Sorry. Were you sleeping?" </big></p> <p><strong>Here are some more examples of stupid questions people ask in obvious situations and some equally stupid answers. </strong></p> <p>1. At the movies, when you meet friends--- </p> <p>Q: Hey, what are you doing here? </p> <p>A: Well, it's so hot so I thought I'd watch some advertisements in the cool comfort of the theatre.</p> <p>2. In a bus, a girl wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet--- </p> <p>Q: Sorry did that hurt? </p> <p>A: No, not at all, Why don’t you try again.</p> <p>3. At a funeral, one of the teary-eyed people asks </p> <p>Q: Why, Why, him of all people. </p> <p>A: Why ? would it rather of have been you?</p> <p>4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter ----</p> <p>Q: Is the "blah blah blah" dish good? </p> <p>A: No, its terrible and we occasionally spit in it.</p> <p>5. At a family get-together. When some distant aunt meets you after years –</p> <p>Q: Why dear, you've become so Big. </p> <p>A: Well you haven’t particularly shrunk yourself.</p> <p>6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask -----</p> <p>Q: Is the guy your marrying good? </p> <p>A: No, he's a miserable wife-beating, insensitive lout...Its just the money.</p> <p>7. When you see a friend with evidently shorter hair -------</p> <p>Q: Have you had a hair cut? </p> <p>A: No, its autumn and I'm shedding</p> <p>8. At the dentists when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth -------</p> <p>Q: Tell me if it hurts?</p> <p>A: And while I'm telling you, you tell me if I bite.</p> <p>9. You are smoking a cigarette and someone asks----- </p> <p>Q: Oh, so you smoke?</p> <p>A: No, it's a miracle.....it was a chalk and know its in flames!</p> <p class="center"><img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> <big>That's all folks - have a daft day - keep smiling! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></big></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/29/what_would_your_answer_be~3647717/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>lifefriendshumourfunhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/29/what_would_your_answer_be~3647717/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/28/sleeping_on_the_job~3644578/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-28:/2008/01/28/sleeping_on_the_job~3644578/Mon, 28 Jan 2008 16:00:08 +0100 <p><big>This is for all you bloggers who find time to blog in your "lunchtime"!! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_twisted.gif" alt=":>" class="middle" border="0"> OK so why are you reading this NOW?</big></p> <p><strong>Here are some very good excuses if you get caught sleeping at your workstation!</strong></p> <p>I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance. </p> <p>It's okay...I'm still billing the client. </p> <p>They told me at the blood bank this might happen. </p> <p>This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time-management course you sent me to. </p> <p>Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper. </p> <p>I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm! </p> <p>This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people! </p> <p>I'm in the management training program </p> <p>Actually doing a Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan (SLEEP) you learned at the last mandatory seminar your boss made you attend. </p> <p>This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I was dreaming about work! </p> <p>Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot. </p> <p>Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off! </p> <p>Wasn't sleeping. Was trying to pick up contact lens without hands. </p> <p>The postman flipped out and took out a gun so I was playing dead to avoid getting shot. </p> <p><img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> <big>So take your pick!<img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/28/sleeping_on_the_job~3644578/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>sleepfunworkhumourhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/28/sleeping_on_the_job~3644578/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/27/that_four_letter_word~3641229/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-27:/2008/01/27/that_four_letter_word~3641229/Sun, 27 Jan 2008 21:44:55 +0100 <p><big>Sorry about this but the weekend is nearly over. <img src="/img/smilies/grayyes.gif" alt=":yes:" class="middle" border="0"> Doesn't time fly when you're having fun? <img src="/img/smilies/grayyes.gif" alt=":yes:" class="middle" border="0"> Then all too soon it's Monday morning again. <img src="/img/smilies/icon_sad.gif" alt=":(" class="middle" border="0"> This brings me neatly to that four letter word:-</big></p> <p class="center"><a href="http://www.xoospace.com/"><img src="http://www.xoospace.com/myspace/glitter-text-generator/holdz/z479ce95e83452.gif" alt="Glitter Text Generator" width="186" height="93" border="0"></a></p> <p><strong>For anyone thinking about a career change beware of the following terms:-</strong></p> <p>COMPETITIVE SALARY:<br> We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.</p> <p>FLEXIBLE HOURS:<br> Work 55 hours; get paid for 37.5.</p> <p>GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS:<br> Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want you to do.</p> <p>ABILITY TO HANDLE A HEAVY WORKLOAD:<br> You whine, you're fired.</p> <p>CAREER-MINDED:<br> We expect that you will want to flip hamburgers until you are 70.</p> <p>SELF-MOTIVATED:<br> Management won't answer questions</p> <p>SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED:<br> Some time each night and some time each weekend</p> <p>DUTIES WILL VARY:<br> Anyone in the office can boss you around.</p> <p>COMPETITIVE ENVIRONMENT:<br> We have a lot of turnover.</p> <p>SALES POSITION REQUIRING MOTIVATED SELF-STARTER:<br> We're not going to supply you with leads; there's no base salary; you'll wait 30 days for your first commission cheque.</p> <p>CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE:<br> We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up.</p> <p>SOME PUBLIC RELATIONS REQUIRED:<br> If we're in trouble, you'll go on TV and get us out of it.</p> <p>SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE:<br> You'll need it to replace three people who just left.</p> <p>PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST:<br> You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.</p> <p><img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> <big> Have a great week and don't overdo it! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/27/that_four_letter_word~3641229/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>humourfunmondayworkhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/27/that_four_letter_word~3641229/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/26/sapphire_night~3634240/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-26:/2008/01/26/sapphire_night~3634240/Sat, 26 Jan 2008 09:58:08 +0100 <p><big> I saw this and thought of you!</p> <p>HAPPY BIRTHDAY </big></p> <p><a href="http://www.xoospace.com/" title="Myspace Backgrounds"><img src="http://xs3.xoospace.com/myspace/backgrounds/27817.gif" alt="Myspace Backgrounds - Mystic Waterfall" border="0"></a></p> <p><big>From me! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/26/sapphire_night~3634240/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/26/sapphire_night~3634240/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/26/thought_for_the_day~3634204/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-26:/2008/01/26/thought_for_the_day~3634204/Sat, 26 Jan 2008 09:50:40 +0100 <p><big>This sums up my blogging experience in a nutshell!</big></p> <blockquote><p>"You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years of trying to get other people interested in you". - Dale Carnegie</p></blockquote> <p><strong><img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0">HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND MY FRIENDS <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></strong> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/26/thought_for_the_day~3634204/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>friendsfunweekendhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/26/thought_for_the_day~3634204/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/25/more_six_appeal~3633227/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-25:/2008/01/25/more_six_appeal~3633227/Fri, 25 Jan 2008 23:22:39 +0100 <p><big>No I haven't lost the plot but I am looking for six of the best!</big></p> <p><img src="http://bestsmileys.com/letters1/4.gif"><br> <img src="http://bestsmileys.com/letters1/8.gif"><br> <img src="http://bestsmileys.com/letters1/17.gif"><br> <img src="http://bestsmileys.com/letters1/22.gif"><br> <img src="http://bestsmileys.com/letters1/24.gif"><br> <img src="http://bestsmileys.com/letters1/25.gif"></p> <p>Confused? <img src="/img/smilies/grayconfused.gif" alt=":??:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>I'll explain - I have been looking carefully at my friends list and discovered that I have no friends starting with the initials D H Q V X or Y and I wonder if I'm unique?</p> <p>Now no Q V X OR Y? <img src="/img/smilies/grayconfused.gif" alt=":??:" class="middle" border="0"> yes I can understand that but no D and H? <img src="/img/smilies/grayno.gif" alt=":no:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p><strong>So I now want 6 new friends with these initials. Surely that's not too much to ask? Can anyone help? </strong> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/25/more_six_appeal~3633227/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>appealfriendsfunhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/25/more_six_appeal~3633227/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/25/2008_dafter_awards_the_results~3629642/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-25:/2008/01/25/2008_dafter_awards_the_results~3629642/Fri, 25 Jan 2008 10:06:38 +0100 <p><strong>The voting lines are now closed!</strong></p> <p>Well you voted in your <del>millions</del> <del>thousands</del> <del>hundreds</del> elevens. The votes have been counted and verified and I can announce (in no particular order!) that the winners are:-</p> <p><strong>Category: Daftest Celebrity Baby Name:</strong><br> <strong>Luna Coco Patricia </strong><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/images/2299778" title="images"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/778/2299778_08107bda21_s.jpg" alt="images" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p><strong>Category Daftest Song:</strong><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/svtcawa887lca305ntwcafrue31capfjbxycapswuuica3elbltca98kaqicaiqgd1kcasmqxcucal06q24carm4psrca61qiqgc/2299780" title="SVTCAWA887LCA305NTWCAFRUE31CAPFJBXYCAPSWUUICA3ELBLTCA98KAQICAIQGD1KCASMQXCUCAL06Q24CARM4PSRCA61QIQGC"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/780/2299780_1ce75e160f_s.jpg" alt="SVTCAWA887LCA305NTWCAFRUE31CAPFJBXYCAPSWUUICA3ELBLTCA98KAQICAIQGD1KCASMQXCUCAL06Q24CARM4PSRCA61QIQGC" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a> <strong>"May The Bird of Paradise Fly up Your Nose" </strong></p> <p><strong>Category: Daftest Politician:</strong><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/jidca2tk4qfca8472fgcab000skcabo2iqfcaf8d94lca7fuu1kcavi1684caw90489cawfvg3mca6cqo2jca18wsl8caa6vby3c/2299782" title="JIDCA2TK4QFCA8472FGCAB000SKCABO2IQFCAF8D94LCA7FUU1KCAVI1684CAW90489CAWFVG3MCA6CQO2JCA18WSL8CAA6VBY3C"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/782/2299782_100451c851_s.jpg" alt="JIDCA2TK4QFCA8472FGCAB000SKCABO2IQFCAF8D94LCA7FUU1KCAVI1684CAW90489CAWFVG3MCA6CQO2JCA18WSL8CAA6VBY3C" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p><strong>Category: Daftest Pop Star:</strong><br> A tie between <strong>Amy Winehouse</strong> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/rs1028_amy_winehouse_rollling_stone_no_1028_june_2007_posters/2299784" title="RS1028~Amy-Winehouse-Rollling-Stone-no-1028-June-2007-Posters"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/784/2299784_53186e32b5_s.jpg" alt="RS1028~Amy-Winehouse-Rollling-Stone-no-1028-June-2007-Posters" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a><br> and <strong>Britney Spears</strong><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/k20cafs2o5mca34lnhkca7bz22ocai74acocafpjrn3caybxu3pcaw33jnocalhd8vkcagglfxmca7bhv6mcaq3r0ftcaf63lhvc/2299785" title="K20CAFS2O5MCA34LNHKCA7BZ22OCAI74ACOCAFPJRN3CAYBXU3PCAW33JNOCALHD8VKCAGGLFXMCA7BHV6MCAQ3R0FTCAF63LHVC"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/785/2299785_0a8e9f536b_s.jpg" alt="K20CAFS2O5MCA34LNHKCA7BZ22OCAI74ACOCAFPJRN3CAYBXU3PCAW33JNOCALHD8VKCAGGLFXMCA7BHV6MCAQ3R0FTCAF63LHVC" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a> (they are obviously as daft as each other!)</p> <p><strong>And last and daftest of all - it was unanimously decided that the daftest blogger is:-</strong></p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/dafter/1706174" title="dafter"><img src="http://data4.blog.de/media/174/1706174_8c2852bd03_s.gif" alt="dafter" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a> <big> <strong>MOI!</strong> </big> mwah, mwah!</p> <p><strong>Many thanks to:-</strong></p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/old-nick/">Old-Nick</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/boredrich/">Boredrich</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/rowtheboat/">Rowtheboat</a><br> <a href="http://joebangles.blog.co.uk/">Joebangles</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/sallyontour/">Sallyontour</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.ca/user/i_am_xenon/">I-am-Xenon</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/esspee/">Esspee</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/notanotherblogger/">Notanotherblogger</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/sweetladyjane/">Sweetladyjane</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/not-herneschase/">Not-Herneschase</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/wensum24/">Wensum24</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/dafter/">My Agent</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/dafter/">Me</a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/index.php">BCUK</a></p> <p><img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> <strong>HAVE A DAFT DAY!</strong> <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/25/2008_dafter_awards_the_results~3629642/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>bcukawardshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/25/2008_dafter_awards_the_results~3629642/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/24/six_appeal~3626124/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-24:/2008/01/24/six_appeal~3626124/Thu, 24 Jan 2008 15:41:38 +0100 <p><a href="http://lostplot.blog.co.uk/2008/01/23/would_there_by_any_chance_be_a_conspirac~3621170?comment_ID=5844407&rtc=1#c5844407">Tentativeplotfinder</a> says she's not comfortable with people giving her compliments. She's busy writing a list of reasons why they shouldn't. <strong>Naughty, naughty</strong>!! </p> <p>This got me thinking.</p> <p>So what makes <strong>me</strong> appealling? Don't all shout at once!</p> <p><strong>Well here are <u>six</u> things I can think of:</strong></p> <p>1. My voluptuous shape (cuddly)</p> <p>2. My graceful walk (wobble)</p> <p>3. My sunny disposition (toothy grin)</p> <p>4. My witty repartee (did you hear about ......)</p> <p>5. My pink spots (beauty spots)</p> <p>6. My modesty (erm....)</p> <p>Well someone has to say nice things about me so it may as well be me! <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/dafter/1706174" title="dafter"><img src="http://data4.blog.de/media/174/1706174_8c2852bd03_s.gif" alt="dafter" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p><img src="/img/smilies/icon_crazy.gif" alt=":crazy:" class="middle" border="0"> <strong>So, go on, tell me what makes <u>you</u> appealling?</strong> <img src="/img/smilies/icon_crazy.gif" alt=":crazy:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p><strong><u>Or</u> what's the nicest compliment you've had?</strong> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/24/six_appeal~3626124/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>funappealhumourhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/24/six_appeal~3626124/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/23/2008_dafter_s_awards~3619341/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-23:/2008/01/23/2008_dafter_s_awards~3619341/Wed, 23 Jan 2008 10:14:46 +0100 <p>Forget about the BAFTAS, OSCARS and even the BLOSCARS the most important award ceremony has to be the DAFTERS. Don't miss the exciting opportunity of voting for some of the daftest people around.</p> <p>Nominations have been received and can now be revealed.</p> <p><strong>Category: Daftest Politician</strong></p> <p>a) Tony Blair<br> b) George W Bush<br> c) Boris Johnson</p> <p><strong>Category: Daftest Celebrity Baby Name</strong></p> <p>a) Fifi Trixibell<br> b) Sage Moonblood<br> c) Luna Coco Patricia</p> <p><strong>Category: Daftest Pop Star</strong></p> <p>a) Jarvis Cocker<br> b) Amy Winehouse<br> c) Britney Spears</p> <p><strong>Category Daftest Song</strong></p> <p>a) Doo Wah Diddy Diddy Dum Diddy Doo<br> b) May The Bird of Paradise Fly up Your Nose<br> c) Dik a Dum Dum</p> <p><strong>Category: Daftest Blogger</strong></p> <p>a) Me<br> b) Me<br> c) Me</p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/trophy2/2295530" title="trophy2"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/530/2295530_97d0a03907_s.jpg" alt="trophy2" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p><strong>So get voting now. Lines close shortly - after which time you may be even dafter than you already are! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_crazy.gif" alt=":crazy:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>Right - just off to write an acceptance speech!..... What? </strong><img src="/img/smilies/grayconfused.gif" alt=":??:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/23/2008_dafter_s_awards~3619341/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>oscarsdaftbloscarsbaftasfunawardshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/23/2008_dafter_s_awards~3619341/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/22/jeremy_paxman_and_pants~3615733/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-22:/2008/01/22/jeremy_paxman_and_pants~3615733/Tue, 22 Jan 2008 16:38:11 +0100 <p><big>Well someone had to address the problem so it might as well be ME! Jeremy Paxman has gone <a href="http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/men/article3228142.ece">on record </a>to say that M&S knickers are a let down.</p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/king_relaxes_2/2293834" title="King_relaxes_2"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/834/2293834_78fad7f9e4_s.gif" alt="King_relaxes_2" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p>So I consulted with my "Royal" designer friend <del>Knickerless</del> Nicholas King (above) in a joint effort to help and to get to the bottom of the problem. Here's a small section of alternative pants for Jeremy to try:</p> <p><strong>A.</strong> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/boxers/2293819" title="Boxers"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/819/2293819_cb10dc93c3_s.gif" alt="Boxers" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a><br> <strong>B.</strong> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/shorts/2293820" title="Shorts"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/820/2293820_022df1f5d1_s.gif" alt="Shorts" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a><br> <strong>C.</strong> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/yellow_shorts/2293821" title="Yellow_shorts"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/821/2293821_ce9818397a_s.gif" alt="Yellow_shorts" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p><strong>Which pair would you choose? </strong></big> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/22/jeremy_paxman_and_pants~3615733/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>mspantsjeremy-paxmanhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/22/jeremy_paxman_and_pants~3615733/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/21/dafter_goes_to_the_movies~3612454/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-21:/2008/01/21/dafter_goes_to_the_movies~3612454/Mon, 21 Jan 2008 23:38:50 +0100 <p><big>In my continuing effort to bring a little culture to BCUK.</p> <p><strong>DAFTER’S BOX OFFICE PRESENTS!</strong></p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/cinema/2292425" title="cinema"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/425/2292425_f4bd2bb781_m.jpg" alt="cinema" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p>Films you will probably never see, but perhaps ought to: </big></p> <p><strong>A FRIDGE TOO FAR </strong> - Tom Hanks carries a fridge to Texas and gets a hernia. </p> <p><strong>FOUR WEDDINGS AND A FUNNEL </strong> - A ship's Captain conducts marriages.</p> <p><strong>GOON WITH THE WIND</strong> - Harry Secombe as Captain Scarlet O'Hara - frankly my dear I don't give a – (raspberry sound effects)</p> <p><strong>THE LYING WITCH IN THE WARDROBE</strong> - No, you can't get to Narnia this way - you have to jump out of the 15th storey window to get there now... off you go.</p> <p><strong>MIME BANDITS</strong> - people steal mime artists from all periods of time and space - no one hears anyone scream for help.</p> <p><strong>MIRTHQUAKE</strong> - (In Sensurround) a giant Ken Dodd tickles everyone to death.</p> <p><strong>RETURN OF THE JED</strong> - Jed Clampett saves Jethro and Eli-may from the dark side in the vault at the Darth-Drysdale Bank</p> <p><strong>SATURDAY NIGHT BEAVER</strong> - after a week of working on a dam, a beaver goes out on the pull</p> <p><strong>SHAVING PRIVATE RYAN</strong> – Soldier gets rid of his beard before battle. </p> <p><strong>SPONGER BOB SQUAREPANTS</strong> – Jovial sea creature makes false claims for social security. </p> <p><strong>STAR TREK 2 – THE BATH OF KHAN</strong> – Ricardo Montablan gets cleaned up.</p> <p><strong>STAR TREK 3 - THE BIRCH FOR SPOCK</strong> – Corporal Punishment – Vulcan style. </p> <p><strong>STAR TREK 5 - THE FINAL FRONT EAR</strong> – Spock grows a new ear in the front of his head. </p> <p><strong>TRADERS OF THE LOST CAR PARK</strong> Indiana Jones and David Dickenson seek the cheapest car boot sales in Clapham.</p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/popcorn/2292436" title="popcorn"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/436/2292436_02d3f1c588_s.jpg" alt="popcorn" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a> <strong>POPCORN ANYONE?</strong> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/21/dafter_goes_to_the_movies~3612454/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>filmscinemapopcornhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/21/dafter_goes_to_the_movies~3612454/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/21/got_those_washday_blues~3610010/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-21:/2008/01/21/got_those_washday_blues~3610010/Mon, 21 Jan 2008 16:24:50 +0100 <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/prozac/2291490" title="prozac"><img src="http://data3.blog.de/media/490/2291490_7f7ed5ad3f_m.jpg" alt="prozac" vspace="5" hspace="5"></a></p> <p><big><strong>Why not say a big welcome to my new blogfriends <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/user/midorikaeru/">midorikaeru</a> <img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> and <a href="http://joebangles.blog.co.uk/">joebangles</a> </strong></big><img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/21/got_those_washday_blues~3610010/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>mondaybluehttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/21/got_those_washday_blues~3610010/#commentshttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/21/dafter_s_daily_dose_of_daftness~3606813/tag:foolsreunited.blog.co.uk,2008-01-21:/2008/01/21/dafter_s_daily_dose_of_daftness~3606813/Mon, 21 Jan 2008 08:30:00 +0100 <p><big>One to be taken three times a day between meals!</big></p> <p><strong>MORNING:</strong></p> <blockquote><p>An elderly couple, living apart, had been dating<br> for several years. One day Elmer said to Betsy,<br> "We should stop this nonsense. We are paying two<br> rents, two car insurance payments, buying separate<br> food and cooking separate meals. We should just<br> move in together. </p> <p>Betsy: Whose house would we live in?<br> Elmer: Mine, it is already paid for.<br> Betsy: Whose car would we keep and pay insurance on?<br> Elmer: Yours, it is newer and runs better than mine.<br> Betsy: Who would do the cooking?<br> Elmer: You cook and I'll do the dishes.<br> Betsy: What about sex?<br> Elmer: Infrequently.<br> Betsy: Is that one word or two? </p></blockquote> <p><strong>AFTERNOON:</strong></p> <blockquote><p>A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.</p> <p>"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document here, and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work?"</p> <p>"Certainly," said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.</p> <p>"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy."</p></blockquote> <p><strong>NIGHT:</strong></p> <blockquote><p>An old man and his daughter go to the doctor for his monthly checkup. During examination, the doctor asks how his nightly incontinence is.</p> <p>"It's fine," says the old man. "I just get up and go to the bathroom, and God turns on the light for me."</p> <p>The doctor finishes up the examination, and then calls in the daughter to tell her about the God-light thing.</p> <p>"Oh, my God!" says the daughter. "He's been using the fridge again!"</p></blockquote> <p><img src="/img/smilies/icon_crazy.gif" alt=":crazy:" class="middle" border="0"><strong>JUST WHAT DAFTER ORDERED! HOPE YOU'RE FEELING BETTER <img src="/img/smilies/icon_crazy.gif" alt=":crazy:" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p></strong> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/21/dafter_s_daily_dose_of_daftness~3606813/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>humourfunhttp://foolsreunited.blog.co.uk/2008/01/21/dafter_s_daily_dose_of_daftness~3606813/#comments